Some of you read the agony of me trying to decide where Thomas was going to school.

Some of you read the agony of Thomas not being adjusted to preschool.

You are all probably aware by now that Thomas goes back to school here soon. Friday in fact. Only this year he’s no longer in preschool. This year he starts the big K. Kindergarten.

Dun dun dun

Starting Friday he will be in a whole new world. A full day program with real work and homework.

And dudes, this isn’t like when we were in kindergarten. No, this is more like first grade. I remember learning my letters in kindergarten, back in the day. Now he’s expected to know them and will be putting them to use to learn real words. He is expected to know 75 words by the end of the year. Which is 74 more than he knows now.

This kinda freaks me out.

My child is a strong willed, free spirit. Which is great when he’s determined to learn something. He picks it up right away. However, when he has no interest it’s like teaching a wall.

It took him 3 years of preschool to learn still only 90% of his letters.

Yet the boy can spell bath. Why? I make him spell it if he wants one. He loves baths. I was desperate to get him introduced to what letters are for, it made sense at the time. If you think about it, it was a great idea. Yet it doesn’t seem to work with any other words. He loves trucks, can’t spell it. He loves to play, can’t spell it.

He’s nervous too. He misses his old friends, his old school.

I keep telling him he’s going to have so much fun and make so many new friends.

He’s still nervous.

Can you believe he only gets 15 minutes of recess at a time? That’s insane to me. And I couldn’t find a music room. They do have a killer computer lab, a gym and a nice library.

Trepidation. That word keeps coming to me. Let’s look it up, shall we?

trep⋅i⋅da⋅tion

–noun

1.	tremulous fear, alarm, or agitation; perturbation.

2.	trembling or quivering movement; tremor.

I guess that applies. I don’t know. I’m just so scared he’s going to butt heads with the teacher. I’m scared it’ll be a fight to get him to do his homework each week. I’m scared he won’t love it as much as I want him to.

I’m scared my baby is growing up.

I’m not handling this well at all. At the same time you’d think I was doing fine. I’m calmly going through all the motions. Getting his supplies ready. Washing his uniform (navy blue bottom, white top, tucked in with a belt) and getting his supplies all ready to go.

I’m trying to be excited. I’m taking advantage of each step and photographing it.

I think I’m mostly afraid that his fear or my fear will hold him back. That just came to me but it rings with truth.

The kid is growing up. It had to happen.

I’ll let you know by the end of the weekend how his first day went.