So I’ve learned vicariously through another that financial aid and loans will only really pay for one undergrad degree. Not the 2-3 I was hoping for. Which makes sense, I will confess. I was just dreaming big.

The problem is, the current degree I’m working towards… It’s at the school I really want to be at. There is nothing about this school I don’t like. It is exactly what I need as the disabled, working, mom of 3. Evening classes that are only 6 weeks in length so I can take 2-3 in a term and never have to take more than one at a time.
(Ok the odd class is 12 or 15 weeks but that isn’t the norm here.) That is like the perfect set up for my mental health and stability.

However, the degree I’m working towards is not the degree I want the most. The degree I want the most is psychology and I can’t get that at Franklin. I have to go to OSU or a school like it. Mind you, OSU has one of the best programs for psychology in the country so it’s nothing to turn my nose up at, but I’m not sure what level of mental health I can maintain at a traditional school.

So it comes down to following my dreams or letting my mental health get in my way.

I’ve applied at OSU. I have to at least give it a try. I can’t just shrug my shoulders and wave goodbye to my dreams. But oh boy am I scared.

In other news this means I’ll also have to find a new job. To work a work-study you have to be going to the school your working for. I’ll be able to find another work-study at OSU I’m sure. I don’t know that it’ll pay as well as this one does. I don’t know that it’ll be as perfect for me as this one is. But it’ll be an option. I won’t be unemployed for any real length.

So I’m doubly scared. This is two big changes coming up in the summer. Both at the same time. And I hate change. And while this might ultimately be me following my dreams, I’m still… I’m rocking a boat that I’m working really hard to keep afloat to begin with.