Hair Today, It’ll Be Gone Tomorrow

It is no secret that hair and I don’t get along.  I can’t stand to have it brush against my face and/or neck.  I’d grow it out and wear it up/back, but ponytails. clips and headbands give me tension headaches and migraines.  So?  I cut it short.  Really short.  Actually, using the word “cut” is a lie that implies scissors are used.  Nope, it’s a razor.  On the #1 blade.  I’m left with peach fuzz.

Some people give me hell for it.  It’s not “professional”, “girly” or “attractive”.  As such I have always asked my employer before I give my head a fresh buzz, if they have a preference.  “Don’t go shorter than xxx” or whatever.  Especially in my current career where I really do have to be professional, I can respect their input.  And yet, I have never, current career included, had a boss reply with anything other than, “As long as it’s not purple, we don’t care.”  Hell, I was freshly buzzed when I was hired at my current job.  At this point my current length of bed-head capable is more of a shock than a fresh buzz.

Everyone else gets that it’s just hair, and I do have a logic for keeping it as short as I do.  I mean, do you want to deal with me during headache after headache caused by something that grows back with no effort?  You are welcome to explain your logic to those who have to live or work with me.

But, the unthinkable has happened.  It isn’t that I’m all “Oh must have long pretty hair” as much as I’m just bored with the buzz cut.

I want something soft and feminine, but as short as I need it.  I don’t want to have to fuck with product or effort to get it to do such-and-such.  I will consider running a brush through it though.  I know it will grow out faster, because it isn’t starting in at 1/4 of an inch long, but I don’t want to get annoyed with it every 2 weeks because “Dammit, it’s touching my ears again!  Get it off get it off!”  But I honestly don’t care on the exact style details, as long as it meets my needs.

What I really need and want is an adorably flammin’ gay hair stylist to sit me down, listen to me rant, and then give me a cut that will make me happy and then I can go back to him every 6 weeks for upkeep because “Get it off! Get it off!”

The money to pay for this would be nice too.

Which is the other thing.  I have trouble justifying spending money on a cut every 6 weeks when I can just as easily buzz it for free and be happy with it.  Bored with my buzz does not equal unhappy, mind you.

Oh and as for deciding who makes the cut to make the cut?  Any single mention AT ALL of “Are you sure you want it that short?  That’s really short…”  I’m grabbing their razor and doing it my damn self in front of them.  Yes, I’m sure.  I’m paying you to cut my hair, not talk me out of my established pattern.

It’s hair.  It grows back.

I swear, the first time I buzzed my head had less drama than this shit and this is all self induced.

I think I’m turning into a girl.  I’m mildly alarmed.

2 thoughts on “Hair Today, It’ll Be Gone Tomorrow

  1. I like my hair a kinda medium length-but I always tell my hairdresser: I'm not blow drying. I'm not straightening it. I'm not putting product in it. You'll be lucky if I towel dry it before I leave the house.
    And I usually end up with something I like.

  2. I cut mine about every two years for similar reasons. It stays away when it's long, in a bun or with a headband. I usually whack it off when my depression tries to get me down. The drastic change is what does it for me, like cutting out the negativity. I found a girl at a hair salon in a mall who did it. The trick is having a goal. I told her I really wanted to shave my head but that I didn't want to look like "that crazy girl." That usually works.

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