Archive for November, 2011

Few Days In Check Up

Posted November 19, 2011 By kmarrs

Alright, I’m fresh out of 3 days at my mentor’s branch and 2 days at my own.

Still. In. Love. With. The. Job!

Really, I just enjoy what I’m doing.  Yes, there is a degree of monotony to it, but it hasn’t gotten to me yet.  I get to use my brain, and really take time to enjoy my customers, and I love it.  I really really love it!

I like almost every coworker I’ve met between the 3 locations.  The one I don’t like I’ve only met once and it very easily could have been an off day, so I’m not worried there.  She very well could end up my favorite.  You never know!  Even then, 1 out of them all isn’t bad!

When I left my mentor branch the manager made it very clear he thought I was doing well.  They even joked about keeping me.  Though they were serious when they said they’d be happy to have me back should they need a set of hands and my branch can spare me.  And I’d be thrilled to go back!

So early into this and I already have this great confidence to my work that apparently shows!  The few things I do have questions in, I have no problems asking and the whole team seems happy to help.

So really, things could not be going any better!

Starting this coming week, I’m finally settling down into my regular schedule which makes me happy.  It’s a better balance and spread, not that it was bad before.  I just like my set schedule much better.

I’ll keep you posted!

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Don’t Drink The Kool-Aid

Posted November 18, 2011 By kmarrs

Today’s texts between me and Pat, during my lunch hour (and JUST getting to work).

8:00 Code word: pickles! Love!
8:02 LOL

10:27 I love you

12:18 Lickle the pickle and tickle my boy!
12:24 The waffle is a pretty beige plaid pattern.  Also.  Blueberry. That is all!  GOOD DAY SIR!

12:25 I just face palmed

12:38 Also. Fuchsia.
12:39 The colors man.  THE COLORS! I can taste the rainbow of awesome and it is loud!
12:43 I would like to state for my defense: I have only had 24oz of caffeinated beverage in the form of canned Mt Dew.  This is all (insert bank name here) kool-aid.  Really, the whole teller line is bouncing around our confines. Don’t drink the kool-aid!  Or do.  Up to you!
12:49 We have been found out! New code word: bird!  Bird is the word! Caw twice and I’ll know it’s you!
1:01 Huh. An entire box containing 1000 packets of sugar, and coffee stir straws.  You thinkin’ what I’m thinkin’?

1:02 Pretty Matt give my wife her phone back

1:03 Oddly, not what I was thinking!

(Pretty Matt is our friend who is indeed very pretty and also, named Matt.)

I think his long gaps of silence was him trying to not encourage me.  Which backfired since I then decided to make each new text more fun than the last to try and get a reaction.  Also, really, there was no shutting me up.

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Alright, I Give Up So I Turn To You

Posted November 17, 2011 By kmarrs

I’ve been playing around with how many posts show per page on this blog.  I’m aiming for the middle post column to be roughly the same length as the columns on either side.  Or at least not drastically shorter or longer.  The problem is, I have no real set length for individual posts.  Some are simply a few sentences, where others are novels in the making.  So I’m having to try and eyeball it, and guess.  Which has me ranging between 3-6 posts.  I think my best bet is to have it be 4 or 5.  Which doesn’t ultimately make a huge difference.  So I’ll probably go with whichever one pleases my OCD mind the most.  But then I’ll change my mind 2 days later, of course.  So I’ve decided I’ll just ask you guys.  Do you have an opinion, not care, or not notice because you are going to individual posts and not the main page anyways?

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Health Activist Awards 2011

Posted November 14, 2011 By kmarrs

We all know members in this community.  So lets’ get nominating!

1 Comment. Join the Conversation

I Am Filled With Rage Tonight

Posted November 14, 2011 By kmarrs

I think my primary problem is that I’m in pain.  And have been for a while now.  A headache as usual but also my neck, shoulders, and back.  I don’t know what’s up.  I just know I’m in various degrees of pain at all times.

And I’m tired.  This has just been since I went back to work.  I’m enjoying work but I went from not doing much of anything, too well, working.  And while I’m getting enough sleep I don’t know how restful it is and I’m to the bone tired.

And the 2 compiled has me in a rough state.

And twice a week now Pat has game.  And I really don’t begrudge him that.  He needs it.  But it leaves me in a state where I can barely take care of myself, trying to care for 3 kids.  And he’s been doing this twice a week thing for like 3 months now and it’s been fine.  But I’m out of nowhere to a point where I can’t handle it.

And it isn’t an increased level of kid-related bullshit.  It’s an increased level of I can’t cope with me physically so the kids are pushing me over the edge.

I don’t want Pat to stop gaming.  I want to stop being in pain.  Because the pain is affecting me every day, it’s just leaving me in worse shape on the nights Pat games.

And then when I am on my own with the kids, I’m left unable to cope and it’s building as this rage.  And I’m trying so hard to keep it in.  It isn’t the kid’s fault.  It’s no one’s fault.  But right now even the baby is getting on my nerves.

I just want to not be in pain.

Physical pain is pushing me back towards bad mental health and it’s pissing me off because I would be so very awesome right now otherwise!

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Their Opinion of My Decision

Posted November 13, 2011 By kmarrs

So I guess there have been a few (Not necessarily anyone reading this, to my knowledge.) that have piped up about my choice to get my tubes tied, verses Pat getting snipped.  Which, ok.  But the thing is: “my choice”.

Pat didn’t pressure me to get my tubes tied.  He didn’t even ask.  I flat out stated that was what I wanted to do.  End of discussion.  I do not want to be pregnant ever again.  Not ever.  So I am electing to get a surgery, a minor one at that, that will help add a few layers of guarantee.

I also was of the opinion that while Pat and I were done with kids, should something happen to our relationship and he meet someone else, I wanted him to have an option with her, should he choose.  Pat is a great father.  Our relationship has been (very) rocky at times.  If we don’t make it and another woman should want to take advantage of how wonderful of a father he is, I don’t want to have made it impossible for that to happen.  That is my line of thought anyway.  Pat has since informed me he won’t be having any more babies with anyone else ever.  Fine.  But that will be his choice should we not make it.

But bottom line, this baby factory is closed for good no matter what my future holds.  And I’m making it official.

There is also the side fact that our insurance will pay for my procedure with little hassle.  There is much more hassle for his.  But I didn’t even know that fact until after I made up my mind so it was not factor in the decision.

The thing about birth control, it is personal for every couple.  I don’t want the pill, shot, or patch, I can’t handle the hormones involved.  I had an IUD and I had problems with it.  Unless we use condoms for the rest of our lives, we are running out of options.  But the decision I made, for my body, is the one I feel to be the best for me and my family.

And the fact I can so openly joke about the fact I’m getting fixed, should be a sign that I’m really ok with it.

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