It’s been a bit since I last wrote. I’ve been a bit of a mess. Physically and emotionally.

As stated in previous posts, I was pretty sick last week. I missed two days of work, though when I explained to my boss what was going on she was pretty cool, and spent 4 days total pretty much living in bed. By Friday, while I wasn’t 100%, I was good enough to return to work. So I did and it sucked but I survived. By Saturday and Sunday I was fine.

Except morning sickness is kicking in. I’m not puking or anything. Just a constant low grade nausea. And I’m feeling constipated so I’m all crampy and bloated. And my acid reflux always gets worse when I’m sick so there is all that too. It’s a delicate balance these days. If I eat the right things at the right time I’m usually able to achieve ok. But even then I have to be careful because eating leads to the constipated feeling. Thing of it is, I don’t think I’m actually constipated, I just feel like I am. I’m having daily movements. Just one of the joys of pregnancy.

My shoulder is feeling a lot better these days as long as I’m not pushing it. The few times I’ve run a lane, I’ve regretted it. Physical therapy is torture. I can’t take pain meds anymore to help me through it. I was suppose to get an MRI but my insurance isn’t paying for it. Then I got a letter telling me that my insurance wasn’t paying for it because I hadn’t completed physical therapy. My doctor failed to mention that part. So I’m hoping once I’m done with therapy in a few weeks we can try again. Though I’m not even sure I’m allowed to get a MRI while pregnant. So we’ll see. My most recent doctor’s note has expired and I’m seeing if I can go without getting a new one. I’m sick of them, to be honest. We’ll see how long that lasts. I’m also sick of fast lane though so I’m hoping it lasts.

Emotionally I’m a bit messy. Between being off my meds and pregnancy hormones I’m prone to tears easily. It doesn’t take much for me to get choked up. I’m a bit depressed. Mostly because I’m stressed. I’m not suicidal. I’m not unreasonably depressed. I’m just down.

Work is work. I’m attempting to switch departments still, I’m just waiting for something appropriate to open up. My boss is being supportive of this. So I just need to be patient. Patient patient patient.

I have to do something hard next week.

I’m signing my baby up for preschool. I can’t believe it’s that time already but well, he turns 3 on Sunday so I guess it is. I already know what preschool he’s going to. The same one Thomas went to. It’s a good preschool and I love the teachers. So I’m very excited about it. Aside from the fact this means my baby is no longer a baby.

We are expecting our tax return any day now. It isn’t quite as big as I had hoped though it will get plenty done. Most of it is already spent. We are taking care of important things like paying back a couple of people. Then we also have things like bunk beds for the boys (long awaited and long ago promised… TK has wanted bunk beds for him and his brother since before he had a brother.) I’m tucking away a few hundred for maternity clothes. I don’t yet have a need for them but if I don’t save the money now, I won’t have it when I do need it. There are a few other things here and there. Some minor some not. Fixing the van, replacing the tv in the basement, etc etc etc. We have a list of thing we went to do, and we won’t accomplish the whole list but we’ll get the most important.

I am looking forward to the date night Pat is planning for us. We are going out to dinner and a movie and then crashing the night at a hotel. I think. Dinner and a movie for sure. We always have a date night with our tax return. We deserve it. We don’t get really nice date nights often. Cheap is easy but we want something a little nicer.

We are trying to be responsible with our plans for our return. At the same time this is our once a year to have money to just spend. None of it ends up being impulse. Usually as the year goes on we finalize what we want so it’s all preplanned. But we get to be a little selfish. Have a little fun. It’s important.

All in all I guess things are ok. My health, physical and mental, will balance out in the next couple of months as I approach my second trimester. There is nothing really bad going on. So really, we are doing ok.

On that note, I have a almost 3 year old driving me crazy and it’s time to deal with that.