Today I Felt…

Ok. Not great, not bad. But ok.

I’ve had a great time playing WoW with Pat so that is awesome. Luke has been a punk so that’s not so awesome.

I dunno. I like to think I took the day as it came.

I lost my temper a few times. But then I’m raising a 2-year-old so that’s going to happen. More accurately I’m raising a 2-year-old who loves to unplug my mouse from my computer. He loves to throw temper tantrums if he doesn’t have my full, undivided attention 100% of the time. He loves to throw temper tantrums if I give him attention in the wrong way, IE I’m reading to him when he wants to play cars. I’m fixing his mega blocks table when he really wanted it to be upside down. Even though he was sobbing next to it trying to get it right side up. 2-year-olds are really weird and their tempers are short fused. He was really cute and sweet at moments to, so in the end I think it almost balanced out.

I go back to work in the morning. As mentioned before, I’m so not ready. This week just went so damn fast. I’m to the point where I dread work. I don’t know why. It isn’t so bad when we are busy. But we are back to being dead so I spend most of my time bored. Well I shouldn’t say bored. We have a huge scan to CD order we are working on. A customer is backing up all her film from the past few decades. I did mention it’s huge, yes? So it keeps me busy in the down time. But it’s busy work. Monotonous busy work. And that’s the worst kind of work. It drives me up the wall. I can barely stand to do it. That’s one of the reasons I think I have ADD. One of many reasons.

I’m back to the “OMG I have ADD”. The “well maybe” was fine and dandy but the more I read and the more people I talk to, the more I start really thinking I have it. And I want medicated for it. Assuming my doctor agrees I have it, that is. It’s the one part of my over all mental illness symptoms that drives me the most crazy. And it’s the one thing I’m not being treated for. It’s been inhibiting my ability to function for years now, and it’s time to put it to a stop. I really think it’s what’s killing my motivation, and that could cost me my job and my family.

Anyway it’s way past my bedtime and I need sleep, what with having work in the morning. So I’m going to close this out. Good night everyone and be safe.

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