A Sufferer of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD): In the 3rd Person Narrative

blog borderline personality disorderJust as I shared in post format, this site’s mission statement, I would like to reintroduce myself.  In the past 6 years I’ve seen readers come and go.  Some have been here from the start, but how many?  And how many people really click the about me link on a blog?  So here is an introduction to me, and if you are one of my regular readers, of a long time or a short time, I would like to invite you to introduce yourself in the comments.

I apologize now as this really is in the 3rd person.  That’s apparently how we bloggers do it.  We make it sound like someone else wrote it.  Yeah.  Like we’d let someone else write our own material.

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Karen has been married to the same man (Patrick or Pat) Since April of 2003. Her oldest son, Thomas, was born in July 2003, her youngest son, Lucas, was born in January 2008, and her baby girl, Samantha, was born in August 2011.

Karen is in remission from Borderline Personality Disorder. Which is like saying she’s recovered, but no matter how many positive thoughts you think, like cancer, you can never assume BPD is gone for good.

Or, you know, it’s back.

At her worse, Karen struggles to get out of bed, eat 3 meals a day, function as a mom and wife, hold a job, and simply keep up her life and dignity.

At her best Karen was a successful bank teller working her way up in her career with one of the top banks in the country. She was known through her branch and beyond as being dedicated, hard-working, dependable, creative, personable, reliable, and eager to succeed and help the branch to succeed as a team.

The Karen of 2007 and 2015 looks on in awe.

Karen’s full diagnosis list, none of which is currently in remission though it’s getting “better” is: Borderline Personality Disorder, Bipolar, Generalized Depression, Generalized Anxiety, and Fibromyalgia. There are a couple other things that could be mentioned but as they are not “official”, we’ll leave them off the list. It isn’t like that list is lacking.

Karen of 2015 is spending her life working on school and recovery, as well as being the person, mom, and wife she wants to be.  She is also trying to get a career as a freelance writer off the ground.  This will hopefully help add to the family income while she is unable to work outside the home.  Additionally, it will keep her writing skill sharp for when it’s time to write her dissertation as a grad student.

Karen is a geek and finds no shame in this. She games online, around a table, and live action. The 10th Doctor is her boyfriend, and he wouldn’t even need his TARDIS, just his brains, quirky personality, bemused grin, and luscious hair. Rawr! All of time and space would be a plus, though. Karen is a brown coat who wants to see Firefly brought back, hopelessly Sherlocked, and a lover of Captain Jack be he a pirate or the brains of Torchwood. She grew up watching Star Wars and Star Trek. The Next Generation will always hold a special place in her over-sized heart. The prequels 1-3 of the Star Wars franchise are an embarrassment to the industry. Sheldon Cooper is her personal hero, Leonard is her new best friend, and Penny is getting smarter by the Chinese dinner. Then one night, in the dead of winter, while Karen was on the brink of sleep, string theory suddenly made perfect, beautiful sense. Then in the excitement of her scientific discovery, she woke just enough to lose it all and has spent her days regretting this loss to the scientific community. But with hours spent reading quantum physics for fun, it will all come back. Finally, it should be noted: Roses are #ff0e0e, violets are #0000a5, and if you understood that, you’re a nerd too!

Karen will write anything that needs said, be it proper or not. She is a firm believer that life is not to be regretted but instead learned from, and if by sharing those personal life lessons here someone else can benefit, then that is all the drive Karen will ever need to keep writing!

And after all this time, she still maintains she’s difficult.

5 thoughts on “A Sufferer of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD): In the 3rd Person Narrative

  1. I’m a nutty old married lady diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Panic Disorder, Anxiety Disorder, and PTSD. I’m not currently able to function in the working world. A couple weeks ago, I started a pretty intensive therapy program that I hope will help. Just setting foot out the door is a massive challenge right now, as well as a decent night’s sleep. I was first diagnosed with BPD and depression as a teenager, but never found the right kind of therapy, or was not quite amenable to the right kind of therapy until now. Either “not quite amenable” or “incapable — a bit of both, I can’t or won’t decide? Ha. I have always been interested in the mind and life of someone else that suffers from the same demons (BPD) that constantly berate, nag like a MF, and suck the joy out of everything. I wonder if there’s other people out there that are rendered joyless most days by this beast. I wonder if other people find themselves disassociating, and wind up feeling completely lost on a bus or other place while their stomachs are doing flip-flops from anxiety and fear. Anyway, I’m so pleased to read the blog of a good writer that is living with BPD and other such serious mood disorders. It’s inspiring and uplifting. Good for you for being able to stick with your passion for so many years. Thanks for being another brave, determined soul in the world. :)

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