Archive for June, 2011

So… Um…

Posted June 29, 2011 By kmarrs

PregBellyHaven’t really brought this up because I was too distracted by things that hurt, but…

30 week OBGYN appointment today. I weighed in at 249. Which is a pound or 2 less than the same exact scale weighed me in at… my 20 weeks appointment. Yeah. Which has me at almost the exact weight of my 16 week appointment.

The thing is I keep gaining and losing the same 4 pounds. I’m stuck between 248 and 252. And have been for 14 weeks.

Am I eating?

Yeah?

Am I eating enough for two?

I’m not sure…

I haven’t had the biggest appetite. It also doesn’t help… well… there is this level of indigestion I have never lived through before. And I say this as someone with acid reflux. It’s literally like lumps of food are getting stuck in my esophagus. And I spend the next 12 hours burping them up with such force I almost throw up. If I eat when I’m literally starving, I’m fine. Otherwise HOURS of misery and there is no eating AT ALL in those hours. The whole eating small meals every few hours thing, isn’t solving this.

So I’m eating when I’m hungry and trying to eat well when I’m hungry. But if I’m not hungry, even if I SHOULD be hungry, I can’t eat.

I should NOT be going 12+ hours between meals. I really shouldn’t. (Not a daily thing, but it has happened.)

But yes, I am eating.

I discussed all this with the OBGYN I saw today. He told me as long as I wasn’t dieting or vomiting, and was in fact eating, he wasn’t too worried about it right now. It should also be noted the baby is measuring EXACTLY where she should be which means she is getting everything she needs and if one of us is suffering, it’s me not her. My lab work-ups are coming back good so if I am suffering, it’s not showing.

But I still worry.

I can’t help but realize that while at 20 weeks I was pleased I could still fit in my non-maternity clothes (with the exception of pants but I live in skirts anyways), at 30 weeks, that’s not really a good thing,

At the same time, my belly is very obviously 30 weeks pregnant. The clothes from last summer, while they fit, are hitting me differently. So it’s not like there is no change. I just feel like they shouldn’t be an option at all, at this point.

I’m to the point where I should be expecting to gain 1-2 pounds a week (maybe not quite that much since I started out over weight) and I’m not even close to seeing that happening. *sigh*

So I worry.

As for this meaning I can get to pre-pregnancy weight faster after birth, it should be noted that I plan to start the Geodon before I even leave the hospital, so that probably won’t happen. What this does mean, is that unless I start gaining weight like crazy in the next 7-10 weeks, I’ll most likely be able to fit into most of my pre-pregnancy wardrobe, which is awesome since I won’t be able to afford to replace it. At least not all of it right away.

And honestly, yes I am a big girl (pregnancy aside) but by that point I will have birthed 3 babies and spent YEARS on meds that make weight gain a given. If I can just maintain, I’m happy. I’d rather have the meds than the thin.

Anyone who says otherwise can spend some time on an anti-psychotic and watch THEIR freakincarbs. (Anti-psychotics can make you crave carbs.)

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The Big Picture

Posted June 26, 2011 By kmarrs

angry-woman-on-boardI should apologize now if this isn’t entirely coherent. I started this at around 6:30 AM when I gave up trying to sleep due to this post writing itself in my head and finished it at 8AM. PS pregnancy insomnia is FUN.

I keep going over in my head, ever with the doubts, “Is this early leave really necessary? Am I just being a big baby?”

A couple of months into the pregnancy I started experiencing cramping my in uterus and lower abs. It was sporadic at first and I never at any point really worried about it. In the sense that, duh, shit is getting real down/in there. Cramping happens. As time progressed, what was sporadic became more and more regular and constant. What was usually triggered by me rolling over to fast, had no obvious trigger. I was just cramping. 7 months into the pregnancy the cramping has changed in location and style, but it’s still there. I’m still not overly concerned about it. It hurts like hell at times. It has been known to cause me to literally double over. Usually, it’s at it’s worse at work because that’s when I’m the most active. But that is not enough to have me go, “Hey, I need to stop working.” It’s not like that’s the only time I cramp. And all through this my OBGYN has been aware and up to date, and we are all in agreement that it’s within the realms of normal.

There were some incidents of bleeding and a lovely couple of days at around 18 weeks where I thought the baby was trying to fall out of me. All were potential warning signs of something serious, but after careful examination everything was fine. The first bleeding was placenta attaching to my uterine wall, it can cause bleeding. The massive pressure on my cervix was the baby pushing the bladder in a new interesting location and well, it was trying to escape. Keeping it empty and giving the baby a chance to reposition, alleviated that. The second bleeding at 27 weeks was of unknown cause. Completely. BUT everything checked out so I was good to go. All three episodes led to me taking it easy for a few days, but I was otherwise fine to continue on.

At no point in this was working fun. I don’t have the type of job that is easy going for a pregnancy, but it was doable and I pushed through. There were miscellaneous this hurts and that hurts, but nothing serious. Nothing outside the realms of “Well duh, you’re pregnant.”

Around May things started to change. See the store gets really warm. Especially the front. Lots of people, lots of machines, doors constantly opening letting in warm air, and a metal roof which doesn’t help. Last summer, when I wasn’t even pregnant, was pretty bad heat tolerance wise. Winter was blissful. When others were cold, I was comfortable. When the warm weather came back around and I, who am naturally warm anyways, was no longer at all able to regulate my body heat, I knew I was in trouble. If I could work fastlane, I was in bad shape but I could make it through. Regular lane was a whole different story. Within 2 hours of being put on lane, I was in serious danger of passing out. All the warning signs and symptoms, it was just a matter of time. It got to where most the time, they didn’t even try to put me on lane, no one wanted me to pass out. But there were days where lane was where I was put anyways, for various reasons. All but one of those days, minds were quickly changed when it became obvious that maybe they should take things seriously. But I tried. Most of the time I hate fastlane so I really did want to be on lane and I thought maybe I could make it through. But no. It should also be noted that while the air in the store was turned on in May, it was broken right up until a couple of weeks ago. So that didn’t help.

With the heat issue I started to think that maybe my plan of working straight through to labor might not actually work. I did drop down to 4 days a week hoping that would help with the over all of everything. I knew nothing that was going on was grounds for a medical leave so I was determined to stick it through. I really didn’t want to quit. Not only am I not currently hireable, but with me paying into short term disability, my leave I did take, would be paid. I’m not stupid.

Meanwhile, I was spending the 20 minutes leading up to my daily clock in in tears because I hurt, it was hot, and I had 8.5hrs ahead of me. There were days that I actually wished I would be put on bed rest so that I would have to go on leave.

This pregnancy was kicking my ass and work wasn’t helping.

But there was no medical reason for me to do anything other than keep on going. So I did.

All the while resenting the baby because I felt like she was trying to kill me. (Looking back, how was this not a huge warning sign?)

My mental health, through all this was deteriorating.

The day before 28 weeks, 3rd trimester is the day things went from kinda bad to really bad.

By that point the regular headaches I get mid-way through each pregnancy had started. There were 2 actual migraines, and the rest were just every day non-stop, can’t get rid of them headaches.

Around 26 weeks is when the after a long day lower back pain became a non-stop back pain.

But it was at 28 weeks the sciatic nerve started acting up. I’ve already discussed it here a few times but the key thing to note is this: when it’s at its worse, I can’t walk. That first day was the most severe of the not being able to walk, but 2 weeks later, it still happens. At first it was a solid 8-9 on the pain scale. With no relief. The ice and stretching that I was instructed to do, is what brought it down to the 8. I had to work hard for an 8 on the pain scale. Now I’m down to about a 7, usually. First thing in the morning it’s at it’s absolute worst and I’m back up to that 8/9. After being up for an hour it goes down to a 6/7. It’s one part loosening up the hip joint, and also just getting out of a laying down position. As the day progresses and I’m active (doctor appointments, and other basic activity) the pain increases. If I’m on my feet for more than 15 minutes here and there it goes back up to the 8/9. If I’m able to remain off my feet, I can keep it at around a 7.

Once the sciatica kicked in, I had three doctors agreeing work currently wasn’t an option. BUT it wasn’t grounds for a medical leave because no one’s life was in danger. Sucks, but I understood. So our goal was to get it taken care of as quickly as possible and get me back to work, doctors note to have me out in the meantime. There were grounds for that.

Then the treatment didn’t work. You’ve been updated on that. This past Thursday was not a good day for me. On the one hand I was ready to return in the sense that I need the escape work brings me. So yes, despite all the misery, part of me really does want to return. NOW. Even to a job that isn’t my favorite job. I need freedom. But I also knew, physically, I was screwed. I was in just as bad of shape as I had been the first day I missed because of all this. But I had missed 2 weeks, there was no money.

I broke down. My mental health, Thursday, bottomed out. Granted it had been going downhill for months. But the constant severe pain plus the thought of going back and the severe pain becoming worse as a result, but knowing there was no money for me to do otherwise… Thursday I hit rock bottom. Or as close as I can currently get, keeping in mind I won’t hurt myself while pregnant. But oh did/do I want to.

Thursday evening after a particularly harsh sobbing jag, my husband brought up short term disability on the grounds of mental health. I had briefly thought of it but pushed it aside. Yes I was rock bottom but why was I rock bottom? Was it serious enough of a rock bottom since I wouldn’t actually go through with anything while pregnant? Was mental health even grounds for a medical leave that would lead to a pay check? Lord knows an unpaid leave because of mental health would only make the mental health worse, so that would be counter productive. I knew my OBGYN and reg doc had been resistant towards an official leave for medical reasons, what kinda of resistance would mental health reasons bring? Yes, I have my psychiatrist and yes, she would be the one I’d need to talk to, but in the years of being her patient, I’d never really had something like this come up so I didn’t know. If this wasn’t directly (however aided) caused by BPD, was there anything she could do.

Friday I was out of bed at 8, a half hour before my usual wake up, and 2 hours before I was scheduled to be at work. My plan was to test the waters. First and foremost, was this a morning where I could walk? I could, but it wasn’t a pleasant experience. I honestly figured I was headed to work. Pat told me it was up to me. As stressed as we both were over money, he at that point was more worried about my mental health. I think it was mostly that. My physical health as well, of course, but only one was potentially life threatening.

And well, I was at the point where I’d rather put a bullet in my head than spend 8 hours on my feet anywhere. Not just work, anywhere.

By 8:30 I was on the phone with work, 5 minutes later I had a doctor’s appointment.

And the rest is pretty well documented.

But my initial questions of, “is this really grounds for leave” still lingers? I guess I feel bad like I’m taking advantage of something? Of what, I don’t know. What detail I gave my psychiatrist on Friday when I called her to ask about it lead to an instant “of course I’ll fill out the paperwork” which should logically lead me to think I’m just being paranoid.

And the thing is, while the mental health might be the official reason for my leave, I know my physical health is a huge factor for me.

Yesterday, my mom sent an urgent email saying there was an event she had discovered last minute that she wanted to take me and the boys to, was I up for it. Er… sorta? I’d actually, just the night before discovered a way I could sleep (involving 4 pillows piled exactly just right) that made my morning easier. I was no longer starting out my day at an 8/9. I was actually starting at a 6. So I said I’d be willing to try. There would be walking but opportunity to sit as needed, and if all else failed I could stay put and they could go on without me. So we went. I’ll be honest, while it was only about an hour and a half with plenty of sitting brakes, it kicked my ass. Really kicked my ass. Here it is the next day and my ass is still kicked. So that right there was all I needed to confirm that no, working a shift at work is still not physically an option. BUT on the flip side, it was really good for my mental health. My boys were in heaven and even I was in awe. (Granted then we left and realized we were all hot, tired, hungry crabby and in my case in pain so it wall went to hell…) So it was awesome, but no, I really can’t be on my feet for long.

I will say the weight off my shoulders knowing this paid leave is happening a huge relief. That alone has actually helped get my mental health state back in the right direction. I’m still dealing with what the constant pain is doing to it, but knowing I can just focus on healing and not what the healing process is doing to us financially is a HUGE relief.

And fact sitting on my mind that I was already resenting the baby for my physical misery, led me to wonder did I really want to be resenting the baby for forcing my hand at living through my mental pain?

Maybe that last one, is the key to accepting that my medical leave is on grounds of mental health, and not physical.

Though to me, the are both a factor.

I guess what I really need to hear is that I’m just paranoid. Yes mental health is a very valid reason for a medical leave. With or without the coexisting miserable pregnancy and complications that is technically what is making my mental health worse.

What say you?

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Linkage Where Linkage is Due

Posted June 25, 2011 By kmarrs

PregBellyBoth articles stolen from the wonderful Jennifer. Both links direct link to her blog.

Presented with little comment, unless you ask for it:

Study Finds ‘Inconsistent’ Care for Pregnant Women With Depression
I guess I’m really lucky here. While my OBGYN and reg doc don’t really feel comfortable (qualified) touching on my mental health, they both know I have a strong mental health team already in place, so really their input isn’t needed. If I didn’t have that mental health team, I’m not sure what they would or wouldn’t do to aid. It shoudl also be noted that a pregnant patient with basic depression is a whole different ballgame than a pregnant patient with BPD. So there is that.

and

Some small risks to antidepressants in pregnancy
I think we all know how I feel about meds during pregnancy but just in case… it’s risk verses benefit. If this medical leave doesn’t lead me to being better equiped to handle my mental load, I’ll start as safe of a anti-depressant as there is. If it does do the trick, I can wait 10 more weeks until I can take it without putting Sammy at risk. To me, that’s just logical. And if I read it right, it’s pretty much what the article is saying. There are risks, they aren’t guaranteed, and sometimes the mother’s immediate health really is more important than the babies possible health.

Anyway, I found these well timed and interesting. Enjoy.

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Mental and Physical Health All Tied Up Into One

Posted June 24, 2011 By kmarrs

angry-woman-on-boardWait, I need to go figure out where this drama llama saga left off.

Ok

I started the steroid Tuesday morning bright and early right after my OBGYN gave the thumbs up. FYI, steroid taste NASTY. Which is probably common knowledge, but since most of my steroid doses in the past have been via injection to the ass, the taste bud aspect of it was avoided completely. And root beer, does the opposite of helping the taste. Just trust me on this. Mt Dew (2 a day early morning to help with chronic headaches that nothing else helps) on the other hand is a bit smoother. The first bite of cereal (the milk actually) removes all after taste. So if you have to take a steroid, immediately chase it with cereal. Really.

So train of thought derailed there. Where was I?

Steroid started Tuesday. 10 days worth. 6 the first two days each, 4 the next two, etc. It would take 2-3 days to kick in but then I’d be good. Only, it didn’t kick in. It’s been 4 days and it’s not even trying. To add to the fun, every joint in my body is suddenly inflamed and well fuckin‘ ow. Which I’d deal with if the sciatica was gone or going, because the sciatica is by far worse, but all of it together… There is literally nothing left on me that doesn’t hurt.

Today is Friday. I was suppose to be at work at 10AM this morning. That realization yesterday complied with the degree of pain and no end in sight, led to the final push towards my mental break down. I was terrified that on my feet three really long days in a row would take a bad situation and make it worse. I’ve already been paralyzed in my right leg on and off for the past 2 weeks, how much more could I take? BTW, spending hours crying DOES NOT help with massive headaches. No amount of Mt Dew will change that.

So this morning I was back at my regular doc. We agreed that the steroid needed to stop immediately. He has me out of work until the 4th. And then I brought up the mental health.

I understand that the sciatica (etc) is not life threatening to me or the baby, so while working isn’t really an option, neither is short term disability. My mental health, however, is a different story.

Let’s be honest. I’ve been struggling with my mental health since I went off my meds. All that time I was miserable but it was doable. x number of weeks and I can have my meds back. Just get through this day. I also was smart enough, and know me well enough at this point, to know that while my BPD wasn’t helping, if I was in a better work situation and wasn’t dealing with so much pain (months ago it was the constant cramping and the occasional bleeding) I would be closer to fine. So I pushed through. Zoloft wasn’t going to fix a physical condition.

Things took their turn for the worse these past few weeks with the breaking point yesterday. In the height of my pain and the fear of what working would do, but knowing money was GONE and I had no choice but to return to work… I was at the point where I was ready to kill myself if it meant I didn’t have to make that decision. Now let me stress here and now that me being pregnant means my life has a greater purpose for the next 10 weeks, so ending things is NOT an option. My life is supporting another life. So no matter how much I want to (oh sweet blessed release) I won’t. And once I’m no longer pregnant and I’m free, well I’ll also be out of the constant hell of being in pain and have the added bonus of my meds. So there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I just have to get there.

When I called off this morning, it was met with understanding (I want to stress that work has actually been VERY supportive every single second of this current saga) but was told point blank I needed to get on medical leave. Mostly so that they could have it in the system, I wouldn’t be added on the schedule, I wouldn’t be calling off, and they would be able to accommodate in advance without being short a person. Logic. I have no complaint. None.

So it was no matter a point of if I went on leave, but could I find a way to have it be paid. I’ve been paying into short term disability for a year now, I need it.

My reg doc couldn’t do it, it was out of his jurisdiction (mental and gynecological). So that left my OBGYN or my Psychologist. I knew with the physical issues not being a threat to the baby, my OBGYN couldn’t do it, but well, like I’ve established, my mental health is well at that point, and mental health is grounds for short term disability.

My next appointment with my meds doctor is Wednesday. I did call to see if by some miracle there had been a cancellation and I could get in earlier, no such luck. I did however, knowing I couldn’t go til Wednesday stressing and not knowing, decide to go ahead and call her.

I filled her in on everything. Well, the condensed version, she’ll get the full story on Wednesday, but she does agree without hesitation that work REALLY isn’t an option and that I do mental health wise qualify for that disability check. So she is filling out the paperwork on Wednesday.

And so this is what it feels like to have a 1000 pound weight suddenly removed from your shoulders.

I have a couple of weeks before that first check kicks in. And it will in no way be a full check. But it will help us survive. We’ll have to be smart, but there will be something.

And I can spend however long this takes focusing on my health (physical, mental, emotional) and getting better instead of scared shitless that my health is going to land my family on the streets.

Meanwhile, as for the sciatica, there is nothing else we can do. No more follow-ups. Nothing. The only option was the steroid and it didn’t work so that leaves nothing. I can’t take pain meds without harming the baby, physical therapy just makes it worse. There is no magic pill other than the steroid. So that’s it. It will sort itself out. Sometime in the next few weeks, or after the baby is born, I’ll be ok.

All the other pains (cramps, back, head, etc) will work themselves out when the baby is born as well. Those are all within the realms of pregnancy. Pregnancy is no picnic and apparently the third will do you in. But they are a part of the pregnancy package.

As for the hospital, because that I’m sure is a question at least one of you has. I did bring it up with my meds doc on the phone today. At this point, there really is no point. They can’t put me on meds, I’m already in therapy, and I have a shrink. That’s what the hospital does for you. (Well, besides take away sharp objects.) I’m in crisis mode but not willing to follow through. So it’s would be a bed, in a ward, away from my family who is currently my strength, and would make seeing my OBGYN every 2 weeks a bit harder. Not to mention my in hospital mental health team wouldn’t be my already in place mental health team who knows me and my history and what I really need to survive. I’ll increase the frequency of seeing my meds doctor if we decide it’s needed, I’ll make sure I’m in therapy as often as needed. And other than that, that’s all we can do. So there isn’t currently a point to a hospital stay. It would do more harm than good. And yes, I know a lot of mentally ill people refuse hospitals when they really need to be there. I’m usually the one saying suck it up and go. They can help. But I’m really already getting that help. And that silly piece of paper my doctor is filling out Wednesday is what I need the most, and knowing it’s in my future is in itself more help than the hospital could be.

Should things change, and believe me as always I have a dozen pairs of eyes intently focused on me, I’ll be there in a heart beat. And if it’s anything like last time, it’ll be my idea.

In the meantime, of all the pills I’m looking forward to popping in 10 weeks, I think I’m actually looking forward to an Ibuprofen (or stronger) the most. Because really, if I wasn’t in so much constant pain for so very long, my mental health would be in a much better place.

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This Kid Is A Literal Pain In My Ass

Posted June 21, 2011 By kmarrs

angry-woman-on-board(Hip, back, thigh, calf, ankle and foot)

Wanted to be asleep an hour ago. Even tried for awhile. But I’m at the point where it’s impossible to get comfortable even lying down. My most comfy side was my right side but well, that’s not an option thanks to my hip. Meanwhile, the baby has taken up residence on the left so if I’m on that side she protests. Back and stomach are, of course, way beyond an option. So that leaves me with sitting?

So if I’m sitting, I might as well write the blog post I was planning to write.

So, y’all read this: Sciatic Nerve Drama?

Well, since then I’ve been to my chiro three more times, my general practice doctor twice, and my OBGYN once. (And a partridge in a pear tree.)

While everyone agrees work isn’t currently an option for me, this apparently doesn’t make me eligible for short term disability. So ok.

My general practice doctor told me last Tuesday that for the time being, he wanted me out of work through the 20th of this month and that the Tylenol, stretching, ice, ect was the best (safest) course of action. (The OBGYN nodded in agreement the next day.)

I am amused that while the OBGYN fully supported the chiro, the reg doc said it wouldn’t hurt anything, but was less than supportive. Never mind that the chiro affects the central nervous system and the sciatic nerve is part of that system. It’s a bit more than JUST bone cracking. But whatever, there is room for all 3 medical degrees in my treatment plan, so long as the gas to and from is willing.

Anyway, the reg doc said after 2 weeks if things weren’t looking better, we’d talk the next (and final) step, which is steroids. Now, the thing with steroids and pregnancy is that while it isn’t outright dangerous for the baby in the sense of death or deformity, it still isn’t ideal. It can lead to a rise in blood sugar levels for me and Sammy. Which could lead to a bigger baby and therefor an increased risk of c-section among other things. So while it isn’t to be avoided at all costs, it isn’t something you do right away unless you have to.

When the morning of the 20th arrived, and I knew I was expected back at work on the 21st, but knew I still couldn’t be on my feet for 8 hours without help, I scheduled an appointment to be back at the doc within a few hours.

It was a bit before the 2 weeks before steroids time period, but I knew if I was going to survive the next day, I was going to need help.

Also note, pain meds aren’t an option in any of this. The Tylenol is what I can take, but it does nothing. Not even a little. The doc said outright that would most likely be the case. I can’t take Aspirin or Ibuprofen because that could kill the baby. I could technically take narcotics without killing the baby, but there is the risk of the baby becoming addicted. So that leaves me with Tylenol. (My requests for an epidural, while duly noted, have been mostly ignored.)

He asked a few questions (Was the current size of the baby running normal? Had I had my glucose screening yet? Results?) and was satisfied with the answers enough to write the script. BUT he did instruct me that before I was to pop a single pill he wanted me on the phone with my OBGYN to run it by her in case there was a specific baby related reason not to take it that we were missing. Safety first.

Then came the bad news. 2-3 days before it would actually work. This was Monday. I was scheduled Tuesday but off Wed and Thurs before working all weekend. He strongly urged I take Tuesday off so that I’d have a fighting chance for the weekend.

Which means I’ll effectively be off 12 days in a row. Which would be AWESOME except for the whole pain and misery and being broke because NONE of this is paid time off.

But yeah, I called work, filled them in. They understand and agree we will try for Friday but if Friday still isn’t an option, just call and they’ll understand.

So the game plan is Friday. Maybe Saturday (at the latest) but hopefully Friday.

Alright, time to go back to bed and perfect sleeping while sitting up.

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I Could Use A Little Lite, So Humor Me

Posted June 17, 2011 By kmarrs

Children of those with Borderline Personality DisorderSo a few months ago, I realized that I hadn’t taken a single shower with my 3yo in his short life. For awhile there, he was too young. I didn’t have the coordination to hold him and effectively clean myself. And I don’t regularly shower for reasons other than getting clean. So showering with a kid who isn’t standing on his own or stable enough on his feet to be safe in the shower standing, just wasn’t an option. Once he got old enough, I just didn’t really think about it.

So it dawned on me a few months ago, “Holy crap, I’ve never showered with my 3yo.” Showering with a parent is a right of passage. It’s fun for them, but it also helps pave the way of not being scared of showers. Mind you, he has showered with his dad, but never with me. And the thing is, he is quickly approaching the age where showering with his momma will be inappropriate. (There is no set age on this. There will just come a day where one of us will be uncomfortable with him seeing me naked, and then I will become more modest around him.)

So one day when I needed a shower but wasn’t in a hurry, I invited him in with me.

Daddy, before Luke and I went up, gave Luke the strict instructions that he was at one point to poke my belly. This is important to note for later.

That one shower quickly turned into me taking most my showers with him.

There are many reasons for this:

  1. The song and dance he does through almost every shower is brilliantly hysterical.
  2. “Momma, can I poke your belly?” “Yes” *poke* “Can I do it again?” “Yes, baby.” *poke* “Ok, now you poke mine!” “Ok, baby” *poke* For a good 5 minutes. Every shower.
  3. I hate giving him baths. Mostly because he wants to be in there forever but won’t let me actually apply soap to his body (he hates the rinsing part.). I also simply don’t have the patience to sit in the bathroom for an hour. The toilet isn’t comfortable for me to sit on while I wait/read/game on my phone. And he usually makes a mess. But in the shower I’m not killing time, I’m getting myself clean. AND he lets me get him clean.
  4. While his dad hates showering with him because he can’t accomplish as much, I actually get twice as much done. Mostly because I’m done about 5 minutes before Luke is willing and ready to get out, so I have to make up body parts to wash. So yeah, I guess despite what I said in #3, I am actually killing time. But it’s different.
  5. I’ve actually discovered the 3 birds, one stone approach. Luke and I get in to start. I clean me, I clean him. I get out. I put my robe on. I call in Thomas and tell him to strip. I send him into the shower with Luke and hang out for a few minutes while Thomas gets clean. I coax Luke out. I let Thomas have some alone time.
  6. So my 3yo has discovered peeing in the shower. I’m not against it, most people do it whether they admit it or not. At first I tried to delay this new trick because well, chances are he’d aim for my foot. Sure enough, while I’m not sure who taught him the trick, the recent trick of peeing in the shower, has my foot as the target. Tonigth, when Thomas and I switched, T had only been there for about 15 seconds when a delighted Luke exclaimed “I peed on your foot!” So I piped up with, “Oh yeah! BTW Thomas he likes to pee on people’s feet.” “Thanks.” Heh. Good thing this goes on in a shower where there is soap and water handy.
  7. For the first couple of months, while he was willing to shower with me, it was a semi-battle to get him under the water. He’d do it but he wasn’t happy about it. Then out of the blue, he started asking to be under the water. Within days that escalated to us fighting over who got to be under the water. We really could use a second shower head on the other side, at this point.
  8. I haven’t given my 3yo a bath in probably 3 months. But he’s getting cleaned twice as often and we are both enjoying it 10 times more.

Really, I’m to the point where I don’t even like showers without the 3yo anymore. It’s just so much more fun when he’s in there with me!

*poke*

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