Archive for November, 2010

30 Days of the Truth: Day 11

Posted November 29, 2010 By kmarrs

I stole this from here. I’m not going to be able to strictly follow their schedule. I already missed the first few days and they are off schedule themselves, for that matter. But I like the idea so I’m going to give it a go.

The idea is that every Monday and Wednesday, though I already have a regular post Wednesdays so we’ll say Friday, you go through the topics and post the truth about yourself. So here we go.

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

Something I’m complimented the most on? God I don’t know. Pat’s response to me asking him was my “brutal honesty”. However, that’s not exactly something I get complimented on. I get complimented on how I bag groceries. Which I guess ties in on some other compliments I get. So i guess I’ll go with being OCD. It leads to compliments. Go figure.

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This ‘N’ That

Posted November 29, 2010 By kmarrs

I’ll start with Friday. Friday was the quietest black Friday I think I’ve ever seen working retail. I mean we were kinda busy but not really. We weren’t even as busy as the typical Friday. I don’t know what it was but it was weird. I was braced for wall to wall people and it just didn’t happen.

I’m having a hell of a time finding people on facebook. There are 3 people from work I’m trying to become facebook friends with. In all 3 cases I have full names but I can’t find them. I don’t know what it is, but it’s weird. I’m getting kind of pissed.

I didn’t write anything yesterday. I’m kinda annoyed because I wanted to write a post for every day this month. At the same time there have been enough days where I’ve written extra that I’m already at 30 posts for the month. So I’ll get over it.

I don’t really have anything else to say so goodnight.

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30 Days of the Truth: Day 10

Posted November 29, 2010 By kmarrs

I stole this from here. I’m not going to be able to strictly follow their schedule. I already missed the first few days and they are off schedule themselves, for that matter. But I like the idea so I’m going to give it a go.

The idea is that every Monday and Wednesday, though I already have a regular post Wednesdays so we’ll say Friday, you go through the topics and post the truth about yourself. So here we go.

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

So you won’t like this answer, but I have no answer for this. I mean, I believe everyone in our life serves a purpose. It’s part of the no regrets thing. Even my ex’s served there purpose and now they are mostly out of my life. I don’t think there is anyone I currently need to get let go of. I’m not surrounded by a ton of people, at least not on a personal level. I dunno, maybe there is someone I’m not thinking of but as it stands, I have no answer.

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Birthday and Thanksgiving

Posted November 27, 2010 By kmarrs

I worked. We all know that by now. It didn’t totally suck. No more than the average day anyways. Two key points to make. I’m copying these directly from twitter.

If you are shopping today keep in mind that instead of spending time with their families, the employees are spending time with you. Be nice

less than a minute ago via txt


I was just thanked by a customer for working today.less than a minute ago via txt

The first should be common sense. If someone is working Thanksgiving that means they aren’t with their family on a day people want to be with their family. So instead of being with family, eating a home cooked meal, they are with you working their ass off. It would be nice to respect that.

The second one blew my mind. Granted most people followed the advice of the first request and were pleasant and respectful. But my very last customer of the day actually thanked me. Totally made the whole work day worth it.

I managed to get out of work early. Everyone working more than the standard 8.5 hours got off early. But I was only scheduled the standard 8.5. But it just so happened the guy who always works fast lanes was coming in and my boss found out it was my birthday, so I was released. I was thrilled because that made it possible for me to eat dinner with my family.

So that was Thanksgiving.

Now for the birthday side of the day.

There was cake. Angel food cake with nothing on it eaten like bread with the fingers. That’s the only proper way to celebrate my birthday.

Mom bought the book I said I wanted. I kinda assumed I was getting it for Christmas but she surprised me by getting it for me early. I was thrilled.

Dad gave me 50$. More than he should have but I’m done fighting over things with him. I bought myself 3 magazines I had my eye on. I bought myself the last book in the Percy Jackson series and the first book in the follow up series. I bought Pat a stuffed turtle. We kinda collect them. And I bought Thomas some gloves. His last pair lasted him 4 year but he had out grown them just in time for Luke to grow into them. This new pair is huge on him but he insists they fit. At least he’ll be able to wear them for years to come.

I’m forgetting things like the chicken crescent squares mom surprised me with. I’m sure more than that. But that is all I can recall at this point.

I’m closing here. Hope your holiday was great.

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This ‘N’ That

Posted November 25, 2010 By kmarrs

I’m writing this Wednesday and scheduling it to post on Thursday. I don’t expect to have a chance to post Thursday so I want to take care of it now. You’ll remember I’m writing a post for each day this month.

The guy I mentioned 2 weeks ago that had the stroke at my feet… He had a brain hemorrhage and is in a coma. They are searching for family to make a decision. He has none. I wonder how long they will keep him. I wonder what will happen to his car still parked at work. I wonder what will happen to his house and all his belongings. I wonder if his dog has starved to death yet. I wonder and I feel bad. I wish I could like claim to be his daughter so I could at least get his house key to save his dog. I wouldn’t try to make a decision about his life but I worry about his dog. I doubt they would let a worried friend havbe his house key. I doubt I could pull off being his daughter. I just worry.

On a less morbid note…

Thomas made honor roll this past quarter. We are so proud we could bust. He was given a certificate for a free meal at taco bell from his school. I took him to taco bell today just me and him to collect his meal. The manager behind the counter was obviously thrilled to be giving him the food. And I mean that sincerely. You can tell in this neighborhood they don’t see a whole lot of that. First off, the poor guy didn’t even know how to ring it out and he was the manager. But he went on and on about how smart Thomas must be and how he looked smart. Then he made an extra effort to come out to us when we were almost done and to make sure Thomas liked his food. He was just a really nice guy who was thrilled Thomas is doing so good.

Luke is trying to kill us. Still. He is just so full of attitude. Refuses to do a thing he’s told. He is a sweet kid and I couldn’t imagine life without him. But you know how red heads are stereotyped to have fiery tempers? Oh hell does he have one. If I suddenly go missing, question the little one first.

I work Thanksgiving, of course. Comes with being fresh blood at a grocery store. Did I mention it’s also my birthday. Probably. I really don’t want a big deal about that made but I do make it a habit of not working my birthday. Didn’t work this year. Next year my birthday falls on black Friday. If I’m still in retail I’ll be working then too. Just how it goes. Hopefully I won’t be in retail then.

I’m a little apprehensive about searching for a bank job. The initial wee has worn off and I’m left with “Aw fuck”. Mostly because I cna’t help but think that a college education, while not required, would be helpful. And banks don’t have high turnover so I imagine until retail there aren’t tons of options out there. Plus I want to be extra sure to work in a safe neighborhood because unlike retail, crime at a bank usually involves a gun. I guess I’m just going to have to wow them with my cover letter and my resume. I need to do something to show them I’d be an asset to the company. Too bad I don’t have copies of my final for Math103. How better to show them my mad math skills. Hmm, I wonder if there will be a math test involved. Basic how fast can you calculate change in your head or whatever. I’ll have to ace that if there is. Might give me an advantage.

So my last day off was Wednesday the 17th. Then I worked 6 days in a row to reach today the 24th for my current day off. Each one of those days I’ve had to be up at around 8:30/9:00 to be at work by about 10 or 11. So today I was excited to be able to sleep in. I normally naturally wake up at around 10 or 10:30 these days. The Lunesta gives me a good deep sleep and I go to bed at around 11. I use to be able to drift back to sleep when I first woke up if I wanted to or was allowed to. But not these days. I wake up when I wake up and my body goes ok now time to be active. So I don’t fight it or I get fidgety. So imagine my dismay when I magically woke up on my own this morning at 8:00 and couldn’t get back to sleep. That’s an hour before I get up on work days. I was actual;ly awake and sitting at my desk for my 8:30 AM meds alarm. Normally I sleep through hat alarm or use it as my second, of 3, alarm clocks. I miss the days of sleeping till noon. The day is simply too long when I’m not sleeping through 14 hours of it.

So Thomas is starting to divide up my stuff for when I die. As in I’m surprised he’s not putting stickers with initials on my things like children sometimes do with elderly parents. He’s already claimed my computer and my mug filled with pens and pencils. It’s really kind of creepy. I mean I’m still fairly young and not looking to die anytime soon. I might gnaw off my arm at the shoulder, but I don’t think the loss of blood will do me in. But if it does, he’s ready to grab my shit.

I had a dream last night that Pat and I were separated and living apart and a succubus came to me determined to save my marriage. I’m not sure if it worked or not. I’m also not sure what it means. I think Pat and I are currently ok. Though he is due for a divorce threat at some point in the next month. It’s the holiday season stress doing us in. Don’t worry, I don’t think he’ll actually leave me. And if he does I don’t really think a succubus will come to my aid. Mostly because sucubi are make believe. Though if one actually did come to my aid I can’t help but wonder if it would actually help or hurt things. I mean by definition wouldn’t she be after my husband for herself?

With that question out in the open, I leave you.

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Shoulder Part Whatever

Posted November 24, 2010 By kmarrs

Went back to the doctor today. It took for freakin’ ever to see him and I had the 7 year old with me. Never again. My mom will kill me because I downloaded games onto my phone to keep him entertained but nothing held his interest for more than 15 minutes. They were all “too hard”. I would download another easier game, but still “too hard”. Mom will kill me. I’ll have to give her some money as soon as I get some to spend freely.

Anyway. The doctor checked my range of motion again and it’s still fine, just painful. He gave me an order for an x-ray that I’m going to try and get today. The trick is radiology closes at 7 and Pat has his own doctors appointment at 4:45. So we’ll see.

I’m still not at a point where I can work lane. Which is driving me insane. Don’t get me wrong, I openly hate lane but omg fast lanes are driving me insane. It just has a way of attracting stupid people. Not saying everyone who uses the self scan are stupid. I mean shit, most the people are fully functional human beings who have grown up around computers and get the idea behind the system. But oh hell are the stupid people attracted to the self scan like flies to honey. I have always hated people, but this job just reinforces that. And self scan is bad. And my friend Cindy would point out that self scans bring out the stupid in machines and that is a very valid point. But mix a stupid machine with a stupid person…

Anyway I’m ready to be back on lane but my shoulder won’t allow it.

I’m to the point where I hope the x-rays show something the doctor can fix so I can get this all over with.

Or maybe my shoulder will hurry up and freeze already and I’ll get transferred to another department. Would be worth it to get away from the stupid machines.

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